A prominent weakness is to fall a prey to urges, drives and impulses. They show up as cravings. None of us are free of them.
Here are some examples:
- Reaching out to check the handphone.
- Reflex replying.
- Retort to someone's statement.
- Waiting to give back.
- Teaching someone something.
- Hunger pranks.
- Having a chocholate, sweet, bite.
- Brain originating thirst.
- Doing something else before completing the job or work in hand.
- Sudden change in plans or activities.
- Buying things by flight of imagination or need.
- Irresistable desire to talk to someone.
- Wanting affection, care or love.
- Go out somewhere for a while.
- Push another to do something for us.
There is a way to get free of them. This by patiently waiting, delaying and postponing fulfilling them. Their peak pressure lasts for fifteen minutes at most. Their overpowering influence progressively loses its strength when we resist / postpone instant gratification.
The urge increases when we tell ourselves “I should not . . . . . . . or I should not be . . . . . . or I must . . . . . “
There are at least four ways which work well:
- Watching the overpowering at work much like we watch a wrestling match or tense moments when that one run matters in a cricket match and not falling for it.
- Breathing deeply giving up on every out breath by saying this : “the pressure is going, going, gone.
- Telling our mind this: “Hey my mind. I know you can do it. Just give up this thought. Good.”
- Diverting attention or sublimating - converting the urge into a desire for something constructive like cleaning something, tidying something, having a face wash, washing hands, wiping the face with wet hands.
The reward is very empowering. How? It increases the strength of an aspect of our personality - the Freudian Ego, the Bernian Adult, our Sane Self. This adds to our capacity to achieve whatever we decide by increasing commitment and determination.
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